Fighting for Forever
by takenbytheskyyy
Summary: Olivia Benson and Brian Cassidy had been together for awhile now, and couldn't be happier to be spending a quiet weekend away in the mountains to escape the hustle and bustle of the city. However, one split second changes everything, leaving both Brian and Olivia to fight for not only there lives, but for each other. A fight, for forever.
1. Chapter 1

**Fighting for Forever**

_I don't know when_

_or how_

_you crept slowly_

_in to my life_

_all I know_

_is you are everywhere_

_in every hour of my day_

_in a second or two_

_a thought of you_

_and I seem to get lost_

_so easily in your smile_

_or within a small memory_

_of how your voice sounds like_

_when you are happy_

_I don't know how_

_or why_

_but I miss you_

_I miss you all the time._

I fell in love with Brian Cassidy the way winter changes into spring; slowly, yet beautifully. When I was with him I felt like a snowflake, drifting through a magic world, free. He showed me what it looked like to fight for love. To fight for _forever. _

"You ready honey?", I heard Brians silky voice float up the stairs and into a room where I was pulling a purple suitcase off a newly made bed.

He met me at the top of the stairs before I could tell him that I was. He grabbed the suitcase with his right hand, and took my hand with his other. I smilied, how could this day possibly get any better.

We were heading to the mountains for a getaway weekend together before we both had to return to work that Monday.

He already had the car loaded, and he opened the door on the passenger side for me to get in.

"Let's do this.", I said before leaning over to kiss his smooth lips.

He kept my hand in his while we drove, squeezing it every once in a while just to make me smile. It was about a 4 hour drive, but with him, I would drive to the ends of the Earth. He always knew how to make every moment beautiful.

I turned my head to glance out the window, we were on a secluded road, I hadn't seen another car yet. The snow that fell from the sky in soft flurries reminded me that it was January, the most beautiful time of the year according to Brian.

Far up ahead on the road I noticed a red car, the first one I'd seen all day. It seemed to be in a hurry. I relaxed knowing that we weren't in that kind of a hustle. My eyes grew tired and he must've noticed because he squeezed my hand once again and told me "You can sleep if you want to, we still have awhile to go."

I nodded, I didn't want to sleep, mostly because I didn't want to leave Brian alone to drive. But my eyes had other plans.

When I woke up some time later the snow was still falling. Seemingly harder and faster than before. Brian looked over at me and kissed my cheek.

"Did you sleep well sweetheart?", he asked. I replied with a smile and a quick kiss on the lips.

I glanced out the window again, the weather was getting worse and I worried about the conditions of the roads. Every once in awhile when we'd turn a winding corner I felt the tires slip slightly. I knew Brian was careful, so I tried not to worry.

"We only have about thirty more minutes before we should be there.", he did his best to comfort me. I tried to take my mind off the weather by turning up the radio that had been quietly playing in the background since we left.

I smiled, one of our favorite songs began playing...

_Rhiannon rings like a bell through the night._

We sand along together until it began to fade out, he kissed the top of my hand that still rested in his. And in that moment I couldn't wish for anything more.

_I saw it before he did. _

_I had to have seen it before he did._

_Why didn't he see it._

_Red._

_Metal._

_It._

_Happened._

_So._

_Fast._

_We were slipping._

_We were sliding._

_And then._

_It all came to a sudden stop._

_"BRIAN!"_


	2. Chapter 2

**Fighting for Forever**

_The best kind of people are_

_the ones that come into_

_your life, and make you_

_see the sun when you once_

_saw clouds. The people_

_that believe in you so_

_much, you start to believe_

_in you too. The people that_

_love you, simply for being_

_you. The once in a lifetime_

_kind of people._

Snow began sticking to the ground. How I thought, could something so beautiful and magical happen just after a tragedy. Was this some type of joke?

_This can't be real._ I told myself, I mean how could it be? How could I possibly be staring at my unconscious body lying face first in the snow?

I heard sirens in the distance and I knelt down to examine myself. Or at least the one of me who was unconscious.

Then I saw him.

_Brian._

I ran to him, his body outsretched. He had been ejected from the drivers seat and now lay on his back on the icy road. I took his hand, praying to hear a heartbeat.

He was breathing.

I didn't understand, both of me were breathing and so was Brian. How could I be standing here?

I crouched next to his body and pulled him into me. Hot tears stung my cheeks, running down the sides of my face and down onto Brians. His body was cold and I tried to warm his hands in mine, but nothing happened. It was as if I was a ghost. Then it occured to me. Where was the red car?

I saw it across on the other side of the narrow road. I approached carefully, assuming the driver would be inside. But he wasn't. The driver side door was open and fresh footprints and spits of blood lead off in another direction. How could he have just left us here like that. I looked back over to where Brians body lay in front of our overturned car. He could've helped, but he chose to flee. Anger built inside me.

The sirens grew until I saw an ambulance pull up beside our car. Two paramedics jumped out of the back with a stretcher in hand. They went to Brian first, and I was glad. He had to live, he just had to.

I stood right next to them while Brian was being placed upon the stretcher. As they lifted him I noticed a small grey box fell out of his left pocket. The paramedics didn't see it, so I waited until they wheeled him to the back of the ambulance to load him before picking it up. It was the kind of box rings come in. I opened it slowly. My heart sunk and I fell back into the icy snow, the box still in my hand.

_He was going to propose to me._

I placed my hand over my mouth, to soften the sobs that no one would hear anyway. The paramedics had started on me now, carefully placing my body on the stretcher. They put my body right next to Brian. I slid the box into my jacket pocket and hurried to slip into the back of the ambulence before they shut the doors.

I couldn't stop thinking about the box. I now knew why Brian had been so excited about this weekend. It all made perfect sense.

The ride to the hospital was long and silent. When we arrived I followed the nurses that took Brian and I directly into the ICU. There was a lot of chatter coming from diffrent doctors who came to examine our bodies. I tried to listen close, but I was only able to pick up bits and pieces.

"The woman only sustained minor injuries and that's a good thing, because I found something," the doctor held up a small piece of paper that looked like a photograpgh, "she's 12 weeks pregnant."

_Pregnant?_

I walked into a small room where Brian was, I had overheard the doctors outside say that he would need surgery. I pulled up a chair next to his bed, he didn't move. His hands felt cold against mine, and I pressed them close to my face before softly kissing his left hand.

"We're going to have a baby Brian.", I said quietly, my tears flowed quickly down my cheeks. I couldn't live without him.

"I need you here, with me,", I took a deep breath," I can't do this by myself."

I heard more doctors discussing my newly dicovered pregnancy and I tried to ignore it until one sentence caught my attention.

_"She has about an 80 percent chance that the baby won't be born healthy, that is if she can even carry it to full term. Her body is extremely fragile right now and I'm just not sure if she's strong enough."_

I laid my head on Brians chest, and my hands on my stomach. I didn't want to lose Brian or the baby. I couldn't. I just couldn't.

The monitar next to me started beeping and all of a sudden there were nurses everywhere. One stood right next to me and places a hand on his neck.

"He's not breathing!"


	3. Chapter 3

**Fighting for Forever**

_It's hard not to_

_fall in love_

_with someone_

_when_

_they see the_

_mixed up parts of your_

_soul._

_when_

_they understand_

_the darkest and_

_dustiest_

_corners of your mind._

I did my best to stay away from that room for the rest of the night. I couldn't deal with seeing Brian in that much pain. They had rushed him into surgery that afternoon, right after he stopped breathing. I watched as they resuscitated, his lips looked blue. I couldn't stand it. He was suffering, and there was nothing I could do about it. I overheard his doctor after the sugerey say that he had some internal bleeding in his brain from the accident. They'd stopped it, but if they hadn't caught it when they did he could've died.

I walked until I found my own body, still unconscious in a small hospital bed in the ICU. The blood that had once been splattered across my face had been wiped clean, and my bloody clothes exchanged for a white hospital gown. The steady beeping noise from the monitar above my head reminded me that I was still fighting. I had not yet lost this battle. I sat beside myself for awhile, still wondering how I could be sitting here staring my unconscious self straight in the face. I tried to close my eyes and figure out a way to get back into my own body.

I didn't want to live like this, without Brian. The thought of being without him was too much to bare.

The next few days passed slowly, and I felt like I was stuck in a never ending nightmare. My bodys condition never improved, but Brian seemed to be getting stronger every day. I prayed that he would open his eyes, because I felt like if he did my strength would be renewed. I could keep fighting.

I stayed with my lifeless body, watching as my stomach moved up and down, but I knew that the machine was breathing for me. How could a baby possibly be surviving inside me?

"Please wake up,", I whispered to myself, "if this baby is going to live at all you have to wake up."

I felt myself begin to cry and I held onto my lifeless self, desperately shaking my shoulders because somehow I thought that would help.

How many days had it been since I left my bodies side? One? Three? I'd lost track of time. I heard the door creek behind me.

"Olivia?"

**A/N - super short chapter right now but I am going to update twice tonight, so stay tuned :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Fighting for Forever**

_She knows_

_he is not hers,_

_to have,_

_yet,_

_she is still in love with him._

_and the thing that makes her,_

_cry at night,_

_is the fact that,_

_she couldn't help falling,_

_for him._

_and if she could,_

_she would forget about him._

_but she knows_

_that isn't possible._

I turned around to see a weak Brian standing in the doorway, his hand resting on the door frame for support. He struggled to reach the bed, and when he did he sat in the seat on the other side from me. I knew he couldn't see me, and I think that is what killed me the most.

Seeing him wince in pain just to lift his hand to my cheek ripped me apart. He left his hand there for several seconds, studying my face as if looking for some small sign that I was still in there.

"I'm right here baby,", his eyes grew foggy," whenever you're ready to come back to me. Please, come back to me. I need you here. Our baby is going to need you here. I know you're fighting, because you're my little fighter. You always have been and I know you're doing your best. I don't know if you can hear me, but I need you."

He put his head down on my stomach and kissed it lightly. I had never seen him cry before.

I cried with him, and I reached out to touch his hand, to wipe his tears, to do anything to let him know that I was here.

"I'm here,"I said softly, doing my best wipe his tears,"Brian, I love you. No matter what happens, I love you. Forever.", my voice trailed off.

_What good was this?_ I thought to myself, I knew he couldn't hear me. He was right here and he still couldn't hear me.

Weeks passed and no change, Brian would spend all his time right next to me. Holding my hand, talking to me about baby names and what we would do as soon as we got out of here. The only thing about me that changed was the size of my stomach, and I smiled whenever Brian mentioned the baby.

_Our baby._

I thought that I would've woken up by now. More and more doctors stopped by to examine me with each passing day. Each expressing their concerns to Brian about the health of baby.

"It can't stay in there much longer. I'm afraid it's not getting enough oxygen. If she doesn't wake up soon you could lose it all together. Mr. Cassidy, you're the only one who can make the final decison.", Brians face sunk, his faith in me was fading fast.

But what he didn't know was that my own faith was fading too.

Early the next afternoon, Brian entered as usual, but this time accompanied by someone else.

It was a preacher.

Brian stood above me with my hand in his. He slowly slipped the ring I'd found in the snow on my finger.

"She's very beautiful.", the preacher said, trying to comfort Brian.

"Yeah, she is,", he took a deep breath and looked at the preacher, "the moment I first saw her I knew we were going to be married. I was going to propose that weekend, but...", he stopped and the preacher nodded, not wanting Brian to get too upset.

Right there, in that hospital room, Brian and I were married. Two nurses looked on as Brian kissed the bride. A part of me always knew we would be together forever, and I pictured us married, but not like this. Not with me possibly laying on my death bed.

Brian saw the preacher out, and while he was gone two nurses and a doctor came to adjust my IV that was still attached to my left arm.

"He's going to have to make a descion soon, she can't hold on much longer. The babys heart rate is falling.", the doctor said as she removed the stethoscope from my abdomen.


	5. Chapter 5

**Fighting for Forever**

Chapter 5

_Nobody seems to notice_

_how sad and broken we all are._

_Underneath all of our_

_store bought smiles_

_and our_

_forced laughter_

_are things we will never let anybody see._

I used to wonder how it would feel to die, in fact it was often something I thought quite a lot of considering the kind of job I had. Accidental shooting. Car crash. The possibilites that came as part of the package with my job seemed endless. However one that had never crossed my mind perhaps should have been the one I worried about the most.

The months spent watching my nearly lifeless body had left me with much time to reflect on just about every aspect of my life. Everything that had brought me to this very moment. I found myself back at the scene of the car accident. _How could that have happened? Brian has always been careful. _I thought back to the other car, where had it come from. _Why was the other car just sitting there? Like it had been watching us, waiting for us?_

No. It couldn't have been him.

My mind fashed back a few months before, the night I came home and found William Lewis in my apartment. I was scrambling to remember every detail because somthing about that car had reminded me of him. The way the driver fled the scene, the way it had appeared to have been waiting for us.

I desperatly tried to focus on somthing else, those days were painful to think of, but the thought that he could be behind this made my heart pump faster than normal. Knowing that he had to have kept watching me, watching my every move. Evil had taken on a human form it seemed, in the form of William Lewis, and I wouldn't put it past him, but what I couldn't understand was why?

_Why would he do this? What does he want?_

My thoughts were inturrepted by two voices, one belonging to Brian and the other a voice I had never heard before. They were talking about our baby.

"What do we have to do to save both of them? I don't care what it takes. I couldn't handle walking out of here without the both of them.", I watched Brian run his hands through his hair. He looked so tired, I know he hadn't slept in more than two days. He hated to sleep, even for just a few hours.

"Mr. Cassidy we will do our best, but the odds of the mother and the baby both suriving are slim. As it stands the baby isn't getting enough oxygen and your wife has seemed to slip into a coma that no one could've predicted. She'll have to deliver the baby soon or it will have no chance, however delivering it this premature won't have given the baby's lungs enough time to develop. It's a difficult descison, and unfortunately it's one you have to make.", the doctor told Brian. Both men looked over at my body. Brian exhaled deeply.

"I want you to deliver the baby then, if somthing goes wrong and the baby won't survive please at least just let me see it. I have to see it.", his face was broken, his eyes were red from exhaustion.

"Of couse sir, and I promise we will do the very best can. I'll be back in an hour to transfer her so we can get this started.", Brian and the doctor shook hands.

When the door shut behind the doctor Brian returned to his seat next to the bed. He took both of my hands and raised them to his lips. He kissed them gently and held them to this cheek.

"I'm sorry Liv, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault, I don't know why I didn't see the car,", he paused to take a deep, but labored breath, "please hang on baby, I need you and I can't imagine my life without you, but most of all I can't imagine this baby, our baby, going through this world without you. _We need you._"

He sat there in silence for awhile, watching me, as if he was waiting so see some movement. Any movement, to prove I was still there. Seeing him in so much pain was like a knife through my heart, like every ounce of his pain was hitting me twenty times harder.

"We're ready now.", the same doctor from eariler reappeared in the doorway. Brian nodded his head. He let go of my hands, stood and kissed my lips.

"I love you.", he whispered into my ear before leaving to allow the doctors to move my body.

"You can follow us down to the delivery room they have ready, I'm sure she'd want you to be in there with her.", the doctor said as he started to roll the bed I was laying in down a hallway. Brian followed right behind, never once taking his eyes off me like he was trying to see some type of sign he knew would never come.


End file.
